But wait, there’s more to my bright idea: What about if a woman were in dire need to get a tire fixed or to put a child through college? Well, then she might pop a diuretic or a chocolate laxative in order to have to go to the bathroom more often. Her income could be exponentially increased by increasing her fecal output. Not to mention all those orange-flavored fiber drinks that make the constipated a little looser. And speaking of fiber, well, that’s bound to increase flatulence too, right? And if men like the sounds of poop and pee being expelled, surely they’d go over the top from the sound of a huge fart!
Imagine it! Women could even take classes to become better poopers for the recording devices they hold in their hands while letting loose. They could moan as though in distress or pain from the huge turd that’s trying to come out; or they could give sexy sighs whenever the pee is coming out. Women could be trained to never dread diarrhea again. They could charge top dollar.
Alas, what am I thinking? There is no reason for us to get our hopes up that the world will of itself evolve into that kind of utopia. It all begins with one man being bold enough to come out of the closet…or come out of the women’s restroom with his head held high.
- Experts tell flatulent flyers: let rip (jboy2244.wordpress.com)
- Poop Talk (sonieblog.com)
- Fart apps (forums.crackberry.com)
- A note on farting (findingamymarsden.wordpress.com)