I did what all novices do on those internet hook-up sites: I uploaded my very best picture and filled my profile with all the things that I thought make me a really cool and loveable person. HUGE mistake. If you don’t know, take this advice from me when it comes to photos and do unto others as you would have them do unto you. (As you can see, the greatest commandment or the golden rule applies universally.) That is to say, please put up lots of photos. Make them from different angles. And for goodness sake, don’t use photos that are more than a year old if you have undergone some type of major change like a gastric bypass or a debilitating sickness.
If you follow my advice you should also be able to expect that what you sow, you will also reap and you will thereby avoid some of the major disappointments that happened to me. I’m going to tell you about a guy a met through a major singles dating site and the really terrible thing that happened when I finally met him in person. But before I do, let me also take a moment to give you one more internet dating tip:
Ladies, no matter how enlightened, evolved, Aquarius, or renaissance a guy pretends to be, the primary thing he cares about if he is surfing singles’ sights is your face and your body. So do not waste your time writing a detailed profile about who you are on the inside. If you get the chance to meet him, you can try to convince him of your inner loveliness or your intelligence or your business savvy in person.
If you don’t believe me, do this experiment and get back to me: On the Singles’ Dating Website of your choice put up your profile with NO picture and write the most elaborate, convincing profile about the amazing, wonderful, multitalented person you are and see how many hits you get. Then post a profile with a picture ONLY, no words. And watch what happens.
Now, back to what I was telling you. Robert was a complete gentleman online. He was everything any lonely seeker could want. Attentive, courteous, and generous. By generous I mean that back then when I was really financially struggling I used to use a cell phone with minutes. Rob loved to talk to me on the phone and it was easy for my time to run out. Well, he didn’t like not being able to hear my voice, so he went and slapped down a hundred dollars on my cell number and that was before we’d ever even met face to face!
I complained to him that he knew what I looked like by my online photo, but I had no idea what he looked like. Again, it was my own fault for falling into this very clear trap. I believed his silly excuses about not knowing how to upload photos. (He isn’t a part of this generation who is born knowing how to use apps and widgets and plug-ins, mind you.)